17th October 2006
Stupid doctors, thanks ah.
I have to wait for another 2 weeks to see another doctor.
The story repeats again, again and again.
Each time the doctor appointment to view my situation is different; I have to repeat the problem I facing repeatedly. Haiz I am so sick of it. can someone tape down what I said and play them when another doctor is here?
The worst sentence that one of the doctor said yesterday was “ your hand is not obstructing you form doing anything, neither is it stopping you from doing anything, therefore yours isn’t serious not a emergency case, you will have to wait. We wouldn’t attend to you so fast.”
What shit is this?
I guess by the time you guys find out my problem my hand has already being chop off by myself.
After complaining so much, what can I do?
Just Tolerate and wait lo. LL--
**you are a left handed, you cant survive without ya right hand right?
It’s the same logic…dude**
>>
If I didn’t ask him to hurry it wouldn’t happen.
If we didn’t went out we went back home straight to shift those stuff home, I guess it wouldn’t happen.
If I didn’t tag along to his house to help him move his stuff, things wouldn’t have happen.
If I didn’t talk so much, I guess he wouldn’t feel so pek chek too.
All my fault. Yesh. MY FAULT!
I should be more obedient.
When he was in the cleaning process, I should have shut up why was I talking so much?
I was so worried but still talking so much. Stupid me;
When I saw blood on him, I was so worried.
I was worried sick. What will happen to him?
Will he faint after a while like what it used to happen to me?
Will he…
Will he…
At that point of time, a lot of question flooded my mind.
All I know was hurry to the clinic, hurry the doctor to attend to him.
While I was hurrying I try to look at him make sure he don’t faint or whatever.
He was strong and kept saying he was alright, I should have taken his words and believe he is alright and don’t bother anymore but I didn’t. I kept talking, asking him to shut up. I guess I was the one who need to shut my ass out. Shut my stupid mouth.
I tried to help but ended up with more trouble.
What the hell happening to me?
It teaches me a lesson. I shall quiet down and don’t utter any words unless necessary.
When he was in the clinic I stood outside and cried. Tears rolled down uncontrolled.
What happen to me? Why do I react this way? argh!!!
Haiz. I am so angry with myself. Really very furious.
I didn’t want to talk to him, I didn’t want to see him. I feel so guilty.
Saying sorry wouldn’t help, what has happen has happen.
The blood he lost was so much. Anyone who saw it will be terrified.
His hand was fill of blood, his shirt and his whole half head was blood.
The sight is still in my brain. Haiz.
Couldn’t sleep the whole night. It was an accident but I feel so bad. Plus menstruation pain …wow~ I couldn’t sleep. I guess I had too much cold drink recently so ya….
Bu ting hua de wo.~~
Head hurting me. I have yet to found the design of my cake.
I have yet to prepare for my chalet stuff.
I have yet to buy a pair of shoes for my birthday.
I had informed all the people about my birthday chalet and guess what. Out of 150 only 5 replied saying “ I ll be there”.
Whereas the rest either didn’t reply else their reply was
“ I don’t know how to go so not gg.”
“I am going oversea so I am not going”
“ erm I will have to see how”
“my sis birthday is the same as yours cant go”
“I have a chalet during that period so cant be there”.
“it on a weekend, I cant turn up.”
What the problem?
I guess I shouldn’t think so much.
When the boat going to reach the shore it will be straight.
Well I am not being unreasonable, in some sense I understand but I believe if you are sincere no matter how you will dorp by the celebration. Whatever.
What if no one turn up that day?
I’m thinking too much.
I want to go shopping else I will turn crazy sooner of later, yet in the other hand I cant.
Can someone shoot me to death?
I need a shoulder can someone lead me one??
18 October 2006
Its 3.30pm.
He just msg me saying he is not feeling well. I guess x ray is needed. How I wish I can accompany him to doctor.
Haiz. sucks!! Greatly sucks.
I am working I cant go out at all. How I wish I can take half day leave and go accompany him. He dad is working I assume. He will say he is alright but I doubt so. I am still very worried.
There nothing I can do . useless right?
19 October 2006
I was at TTSH last night till 1.30am.
I dragged myself home at around 8pm. I was so tired.
I want to get out of the office. I was too tired exhausted.
Tons of work to finish.
I nearly couldn’t get myself to walk home I wish I could climb home. Or crawl home.
HaiZ~ by the time I got him last night was around 10pm. Finished shower at around 10.15. he called saying he is not well. Without a second thought I change and ran to his house. He was unwell. Looking at him, you know clearly that he cant even walk properly, he was breathless, feeling dizzy.
I drag him to the doctor thinking that the 24hr at hougang was still open but I was wrong. It isn’t 24hr anymore. end up we took a cab down to serangoon 24 hours clinic.
Useless doctor he cant do anything he refer us to TTSH. Quickly took a cab down, we were sort of lucky coz there was cab all over. Took us not long to reach TTSH.
The queue was damn bloody long.
Went for x ray, doctor. I left him alone there coz dad kept calling and scolding me. I got no choice but to leave him there. I msg him every hourly to ensure he is okay. I was worried. Haiz~ selfish parent that I had. They said stuff which made them so selfish.
Do you both know that when I was in trouble who helped mi most?
Do you both know when I was in difficulties who help mi most?
Do you know who was the one who is always here for me?
I hate you guys. Stupid!
I make sure I shoot you back with these words one day. Don’t give me the chance to.
Idiot. This morning he msg him saying he is admitted.
Going to visit him after work.
Time, Could you move faster and let my working time pass faster please?
So I can go collect my nano and then go down to visit him?
I will appreciate.
Been praying he be okay..
God please let him be alright. Nothing must happen to him.
Can you hear me?
Please….~
**which idiot stole my staple and puncture?
Asshole..~~ tons of work coming in again~argh!
I am going to go out play this holiday, we plan to go ikea, shopping out to play but now he is in hospital …argh!!
Where were you when skies were grey
10/21/2006 12:32:00 AM <3
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